We tend to use the word “hope” a lot in our everyday communication- “I hope you have a nice day, I hope it does not rain this weekend, I hope they saved me some cookies, etc.…”. It seems like hope has become similar to the word love- over used while not truly understood. To be honest with you, I do not believe that I truly understood what hope was. I could define it, sure, but now that my hope has recently been put to the test- I have a deeper understanding of what exactly it is and have learned how to apply it to my day to day struggles. God has encouraged me to share this experience of growth with you.  

A mere 2 months in and 2023 has already been a very challenging year for me. My precious feline companion, Mulligan, has been suffering with recurrent GI issues, was diagnosed with a bacterial infection and hyperthyroidism, endured 1 urgent care and 2 vet visits, 1 course of antibiotics, 2 courses of Flagyl (for diarrhea), and is now taking daily thyroid medication, milk thistle (liver supplement), and probiotics. As you can see, we have been very busy. This situation has resulted in an intense battle within me. On the one hand, I have been emotionally rocked, heartbroken for her suffering and desperately wanting more time with her; on the other hand, I am so very grateful for the 9 years I have had with her and trust the Lord implicitly with both her life and mine. All the while I have found myself struggling and asking God, “How do I find the place of peace and rest you want for me amid this internal battle?” He revealed the way...

Psalm 71:14 “As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.”

A close friend of mine sent this verse to me for encouragement, along with this sentiment, “Where there is life, there is hope”. I do not believe she has any idea how supremely impactful this was to me. You see, when she called me prior to sending the text, I was in prayer. I was pleading with the Lord for the answer, the way to peace amid the turmoil I was experiencing. Right before she called, He gave me the answer- hope. Hope for what exactly? Her text reminded me that while Mulligan lived, there remained a chance that she would recover. As I considered this, the following verses came to mind:

2 Samuel 12:22 “He said, ‘While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept, for I said, Who knows whether the Lord will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’”

Jonah 3:9 “Who knows? God may turn and relent and turn from his fierce anger, so that we may not perish.”

2 Corinthians 12:7-8 “ Because of the extraordinary greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself! Concerning this I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might leave me.”

King David, “a man after God’s own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14) guilty of both adultery and murder (2 Samuel 11:1-17), the Ninevites, described as an “evil” people (Jonah 3:5), and the Apostle Paul who was granted the honor of seeing Heaven and then provided a humbling “thorn in the flesh”, all expressed their hope to be released from intense suffering and/or impending death. Hope is what we humans cling to during suffering, lest we fall into despair. By the same token, we are to trust in His will for our lives, as the Lord voiced in His prayer recorded in Luke 22- “Not my will but your will be done”. In the end, David lost his child, the people of Nineveh were spared from God’s planned annihilation, and Paul’s “thorn” remained. All of them expressed their hope, David and Paul accepted God’s will for their lives even though their personal desires were not met. Our deliverance does not always come in the way we wish, but it does come. It is in that deliverance, His perfect will, that we are to place our hope.

Psalm 34:19 “Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.”

When I first started to write down thoughts and verses for this blog there was a very real possibility that Mulligan would continue to decline and die. Just remembering those days as I type that sentence brings a pain to my chest and tears to my eyes. However, even then, I knew without a doubt that however the situation played out, it was for the best and if handled with His power, would result in sanctification for me and glorification for God.

I will share with you the words of encouragement I have been giving to myself, on repeat, for the past couple of months, “He’s got you, no matter what happens, He’s got you”. So, no matter what you are facing right now- take a deep breath, close your eyes, speak words of encouragement to yourself from His Word, and remember that your hope is in Him.

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

P.S. Mulligan has been doing better and slowly improving over the past few weeks. We are not completely on the other side of this, but I continue to live in gratitude for each day I have with her, hoping for many more, and trusting in Him that no matter how many days we have left together, it will be the perfect amount.